It used to be something you did for three hours on a groggy Saturday morning. Now, the SAT and its evil sister, the ACT, are something you think about when you’re 12, take prep classes for, and spend summers committing their flashcards to memory, all in the name of a test that purports to measure what you’ve learned in high school.
There’s two problems with this. First, they just measure the Math and English you’ve learned in high school (although the ACT has an optional science test that, truth be told, is much closer to really determining ability to do science). Second, none of this measures your ability to learn in the future—and isn’t that what colleges really want to know? SAT used to do this, or at least claimed to, but testing what you know is easier, so they gave up the nobler pursuit, and now ask about how old Mary was when Jane was as old as Lincoln was when he first practiced law.
Since there seems to be a need for a better way to see if students are really ready for college, here’s my contribution. Give them these, and see what they can do. They will be answering on non-Internet connected computers that are AI free.
In 75 words, name a nineteenth century female author other than Jane Austen, and compare the relevance of one of their works to The Truth Will Set You Free by Gloria Steinem.
Write an original sonnet in Shakespearean format about joy.
Name three non-technological inventions China has contributed to the world and describe their relevance.
Summarize 100 Years of Solitude in a haiku.
Explain in 50 words or less why every triangle is half of a rectangle.’
In less than 75 words, what is plastic made of, and why can’t you reduce plastic back to its basic parts once you put them together?
Explain the concept of 40 Acres and a Mule, why it failed, and three ways it could have affected American society had it been fully implemented.
Give a 50-word explanation of what calculus is, and what it’s used for.
Diagram this sentence: Judy and her sister Jennifer walked to the store, which was three blocks away, to get a quart of milk, a bag of flour, and six eggs, to make a cake later today.
Give a 75-word summary of your state capitol, including why it is where it is.
Detroit’s convention center used to be named after Albert Cobo. It isn’t anymore. Why not?
History is replete with circumstances that seemed hopeless. Pick one, summarize its background, and discuss how those circumstances were turned around to create a success (75 words).
Who is Katherine Johnson, and what three contributions did she make to society?
Who is Joseph Shabalala, what was his contribution to society, and why is it important?
In 50 words or less, identify a world problem and solve it.
Why was John Singer Sargent considered a rebel in his time? Using this same logic, who is a rebel today, and why?
You have $1.65 in change, no bills, and exactly 15 coins. Name three ways the coins could be distributed.
How do intermittent windshield wipers work?
Name five things you can do with a grapefruit besides eat it.
And finally:
A ball rolled on a friction free floor travels one foot in the first second, half a foot in the next second, a quarter of a foot in the third second, and so on.
At what point has it travelled a total of two feet?
At what point does it come to rest?
Magnificent Room
To whom is it we owe this day
The good we’ve known
The wrongs made right
And what exactly do we pay
A tithe? A tax?
Truth jarred from night?
The prophets had few clues of this
And they had hours heavenly-faced
The kids want food and to be kissed
So how could I the answer trace?
What world views could I erase?
My Starbucks guy just always knows
My car my voice
And what I’d like
That somehow gives me great repose
It gives the day
An outlook hike
The constancy of our exchange
Against the news the radio blares
Assures me in a way that’s strange
The unknown that may be out there
Can be faced down without a care.
It’s true for more than drinking bays
The postal worker’s
Whistling walk
The middle schoolers shouting ways
En route from school
At three o’clock
The heat of 5pm beats on
As tired shoes retrace their path
Across the driveway whereupon
I find my bride correcting math
Whose “How was your day” still makes me laugh.
The priest gives public thanks so keen
Thanksgiving is
Our turn to bow
Yet all the moments in between
Deserve our thanks
They too endow
The good that Sundays celebrate
It’s not a 1-in7 thing
I sip the cup and contemplate
Just what the mail will bring in freight
And what eight graders soon will state
If x will equal 12 or 8
That constancy has such a ring
One cannot help but thank them whom
Created this magnificent room.
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