Wonder

My wife and I had to change cars, and I needed her keys.  I slowly opened the door to her classroom, and beheld a class of most alert seven-year-olds, just starting the day’s lesson.

“This is my husband, Pat” she said, in one of the best summaries I have ever heard of what I tried to do for a living. “He helps older students decide where to keep learning in college.”

There was a brief pause, then one pupil thoughtfully said “My mom went to the Michigan school.”

We were off to the races, as another quickly added “My mom went to State.”

A third student started eagerly “My Mom—“, paused for a moment, then added “works really close to where we live!”

And that, my friends, is the essence of interaction.  Create an atmosphere where they come as they are, affirm them for being just that, and show them the world they’ve come to explore.

The question that plagues educators—indeed, the question that plagues us all—is, what happens? We get fabulous discussions like this one from youngsters, but by teendom, too many are silent, disengaged, and brooding, both in and out of the classroom, from then and into adulthood.

So, what to do?

Any parent, educator, checkout cashier, religious officiant, Uber driver, good friend—or global occupant using oxygen– needs to understand that, like it or not, they are modeling viewpoint first, content second. Always.

This can’t be overstated, and requires some humility.  We are experts in our work, our way of life, and our world, and are convinced it is terribly complicated, when the essence of it can be understood in five minutes—as long as the listener is receptive.  Build your conversations on that—including the ones you have with yourself– and you’ve got something. 

How do we achieve this—how do we keep the door of inquiry as wide open as possible, to even the most disinterested and cynical?  With these four attitudes towards talking, teaching, and living:

“Wow!” Society marvels at the delight young children show in the simplest things—a butterfly, raindrops, the box that the Christmas gift came in (which often gets more attention than the gift itself).  Adults need to do everything possible to nurture this intuitive sense at any age, and that’s best done by example.  Marvel at everything.

“What is that?” It’s now time to feed the information beast—what’s this thing or idea called, where did it come from, what is it used for, what makes it work?  These questions are key to providing a baseline of expertise your audience is now receptive to.  Wow has them interested, so now What matters. As long as it’s in short, easy-to-understand sentences.

“So does that mean…?” Once they’re introduced to the nuts and bolts of something, it’s time to BE QUIET.  Time to internalize the essence gives them time to personalize the idea, and apply it to the rest of what they’ve learned in life.  Examples may help drive this home, but hold on to them for a minute—give them a chance to formulate and clarify the parts of the idea they’re joyously wrestling with, and let them speak first.

“What if…?”  Laying the foundation for the first three attitudes leads to the jackpot, where they see the new concept for what it is, and takes it—or something like it– to a place it hasn’t been before—at least in their world, and perhaps even in ours.  This step combines knowledge with creativity and imagination, making for broad thinkers, doers, and life-livers—the ultimate goal.

Her Love

When day’s end finds me in despair
To you and you alone I turn
In hopes my heart you will repair
And help my soul a lesson learn
But firmly you with love demur
And urge my focus realign
From mortal joys and worldly curs
To higher platform with design
That made all whole and whole will stay
With each need met ‘fore being known
No start or stop to endless day
The source from which all things were grown
An aggregation infinite
Each notion strong on its own feet
And yet together, closely knit
United blend their voices sweet.
God’s fairest daughter shows again
The blessings that the heavens lend.

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